Life at the Elevator Doors

 

There is a lot to learn about human nature and society in and around a public elevator. I work in a building that has a public elevator. I use it frequently, so I am constantly navigating the unwritten and unspoken rules and expectations of elevator etiquette. Those who have spent time in such an environment will recognize the dynamics of so many lives, running their natural courses with their own drives and fears and tasks, converging into this one box — a necessary device for us to move from where we are to where we need to be.

And there are always present, in every public space, those who do not understand how to properly conduct themselves in such a way as to be respectful of others who are sharing this space. Sometimes this comes down to noise, other times to space, and most often in the unspoken expectations that make for polite engagement. Being willing to punch the button for someone else as they get on is respectful, while standing in front of the buttons without offering such a courtesy is considered rude. Holding the door for someone who is rushing to jump on at the last minute is a nice gesture, while ignoring a fellow traveler's plight reeks of indifference.

One particular behavior of which I have often borne witness in recent years is the manner in which men and women enter and exit the elevator car. This is a simple concept: those wishing to exit a car ought to get off, and then those who wish to enter a car can walk on. Such procedure is even more important when the car arrives at the main level —often considered the lobby — of the building. This is where the majority of people will be getting on an elevator, but also (and this is quite important) where the majority of people will be getting off the elevator. The need to clear out space from the small elevator car is always important, but especially so on the main level.

What disruption to this process have I been experiencing? I have noticed an increased tendency for waiting individuals to immediately move to embark the elevator car at the moment the doors open, causing a bottle-neck, or gridlock, at the point of entrance and exit. This causes confusion, to be sure, and some minor inconvenience. For what it's worth, these are not great irritations on their own, unless they have built up from repeated experiences, or have added to the stress the individual has already experienced during the day.

More important is the statement that is being made in this particular behavior. The individual waiting for an elevator seems to have no imagination that would inform him that this elevator is a device that is being used by other people. Those who walk up to the doors, hit the button, wait a few moments, and then take their first steps towards entering the elevator car even while the doors are opening seem to be oblivious to the fact that someone else might be using this same elevator. 

The only thing worse than this is when this person takes their steps towards the door only to be met with someone exiting the elevator. In this case there are two options for the one entering: either step back and allow people to exit, or continue walking and make an awkward exchange of everyone crowding around everyone else in entering and exiting. I have been in countless situations where the person keeps walking, and I have had to jump out of the way to make room for them, even though I as the exit-er ought to have the right-of-way in leaving.

When we behave this way we send out a very strong, if not sad, message to those we encounter: we consider ourselves and our tasks more important than you and your tasks. It is self-centered behavior that expects others to accommodate to you, especially when there is an expectation of how things ought to be. But, I am busy and I need to get to the next thing. You see, unfortunately, we have become so busy and self-absorbed as a society that we are willing to place our tasks over and above people, thus giving ourselves permission to treat others rudely and expect them to move out of our self-important way — giving them a shove if necessary.

And if we're willing to behave this way at the elevator doors, what else are we doing in our lives to push others out of the way and how else are we devaluing our relationships with others? For the Christ-follower, this is a vital piece of our lives: for we are called to show our love for God by the way we show our love to others. Are we so self-important that we cannot yield a small moment to show grace and kindness to someone else? It is in these little things that we make big impacts — bigger than we can now understand. And it is in being faithful in these little things that will lead us to the opportunity when we will be entrusted with bigger things.